darkly dreaming PVD

someone told me this blog somehow gives out a dark vibe.

really?  time to refuel and get positive.

---o0o---

famous last words:

"Part of the fantasy of every betrayed person is that one day, the person who hurt you will come back and answer all your questions and apologize for hurting you.  But the thing is, they won't.  They'll die a liar and will feel good about themselves.  That's how selfish they are.  They can't give you closure, you have to find it yourself.  You get angry with them.  But bless them in your mind and have peace with yourself.  So if that person comes back, you can say 'hi' and 'goodbye' in one sentence."

(-from a text message)

good vibes

exactly. you tell 'em, adele. =)

 

 Adele - One and Only (please click to see the link)

the baklush love

my college friends and i have this group created in facebook where we get to comment freely and no other person can read it except us.  as you all know my other facebook account had been deactivated since the 2nd week of May.  i just opened it again earlier and i found out my college buddies had been missing me and they were all curious as to why i deactivated again.  it felt good that real friends sincerely check up on you and don't just show up whenever they need something.  they never used the friendship for their own benefits. yes, i'm making parinig to those who use me very well. my true friends never diss me out, ever.  and for that i love them so.  12 years of friendship is a big deal for me that's why i keep them and i am there for them for as long as they want me to be around.

abot tanaw (alaala ni gael)

kaninang hapon, nakita ko ang anino mo.

tinawag ka ngunit hindi ka lumingon.

ngayon ay alam ko na ang halaga ko sa iyo.

ang layo layo pala ng hahabulin ko.

ang hirap hirap pala ng inaabot ko.

nakakapagod palang habulin ang tumatakbo

papalayo sa iyo

at papalapit sa kanya.

ang hirap palang palingunin ang taong 

may nililingon nang iba.

objection to rejection

*someday, i will take care of my heart, i promise.  but for now, i will let it feel angry, frustrated and sad.  and in love.  not talking about just one guy haha.  i don't want to skip every process and not really heal.  i'm not in a hurry.  i like what it does to me.  a wounded warrior will only make him braver.  and as to what i feel - it will die its natural death.  and clearly it's just not that soon.  i'm a sicko, i like myself wounded.

-

*A man could tell a thousand lies

I've learned my lesson well

Hope I live to tell the secret 

I have learned

'Til then -- it will burn inside of me."

(~Madonna)

-

"yes, i may be cold, i may be frigid, but rejection? it's something i will never get used to."

not a wishful thinking

I’m seriously praying that your path won’t turn out like mine.  Because ten years is too long just to get wasted.  Good to know you’re doing productive things to be a better man for her.  Although I think you are more than enough, carry on, you do your thing, do what makes you happy.

-

We can’t blame another person or time or circumstances as to why the love fell apart, or didn’t get pushed through.  It’s just that the love is too little, or too much.  She was the first one, you were the latter. =P

-

But I wish I she could see what love has done to ya.  I wish she could see right now that you may have missed out on enjoying the perks of being the single guy because you don’t fool around.   You only wanted one.  I wish she knew all the efforts of learning to play an instrument so that you could play her favorite song (I can see you’ve been watching too many koreanovelas. Kidding).  I wish she knew you don’t see anything but her, no matter what city, state or country you’ve been to.

I wish she could see that, yes, it is possible that love can stand the test of time.  If ten years is not enough of a proof then I don’t know what else will.

I wish she can hear you out, I wish she can read what you have told me in our conversations.  I wish she could realize that after all those years – it was just her.  And that no other man could love her as much as you do.  You said so =)

I wish she knew all of your plans, and that she is included in all of it.  I wish she also believe in fairy tales and happy endings like you.

I wish she could reciprocate, and at least appreciate, what you have done and what you have become just to prove yourself worthy to her.  Is she a princess or something, cos damn your efforts are hardcore. =P

I wish she hasn’t forgotten what you two had before, because clearly you haven’t.  Seems like you remember every detail.  I wish she knew the depth and impact she had made on you.

-

I wish that she could see your worth even without you making an effort.  I really wish she knew all of it because I do.  I’m pretty sure every girl in the world would want someone like you. *kilig kilig

I wish that ten years of countless efforts will reap a great effect.

-

But more than anything else, I just want you to be happy.  And for now it was her who could make you.

Happy happy joy joy <3

You deserve it =)